“Mummy, I want to go home”

My daughter said this yesterday when she saw a picture of the road outside our old apartment in CT on my husband’s laptop. She pointed at the picture and said it again. My eyes filled with tears and I made some excuse to go to the room so I could bawl my eyes out in peace. Why?

  • I’m pregnant and everything makes me cry
  • She’s never said ‘home’ before. She refers to where we stay now as ‘mummys house’. HOME is such a personal word
  • I also want to go ‘home’

We only stayed in CT for a year but I miss it so much. Not the place as much as the freedom that came with it. We didn’t have any immediate family or close friends there so our time was our own. It was the three of us on this amazing adventure and I loved it. I loved the time we had for each other. I loved having my daughter all to myself during the day. I loved the weekend’s together with us all vegging in front of the tv in our pjs without worrying about someone popping by for a visit. I miss living in our little bubble. 

We moved back to our hometown for all the right reasons but I would be lieing if I said I was happier now. I love love love having my husband at home full time. He’s my best friend and my rock. I could live anywhere as long as we’re together. What I don’t enjoy is not having our own place. There always seems to be something to do or somewhere to go. Even though I’m responsible for a lot of these plans I hate it. I hate that time is flying by and I feel like we’re not really enjoying ourselves.

2 thoughts on ““Mummy, I want to go home”

  1. This really resonated with me. Two years ago when my oldest child was two we moved and I have still not reclaimed the feeling of home that we had. We too left a warm little bubble to be closer to family. I still miss it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I feel so guilty to say that I feel stifled because being close to everyone has had a lot of pros. The biggest being the time my daughter gets to spend with her grandparents. But I actually cannot wait to leave again. 🙈

      Liked by 1 person

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